Our Wonderful Unreal Hometown

I live in a city that has often been described as "twenty-five square miles surrounded by reality."

Here are two examples of the unreal lives we live here. First off, our traffic signals are messed up. Red means "STOP" but yellow means "Hurry up and see if you can get through-- whether you hurt somebody or not." The city has installed lights mid-block where pedestrians can push the button to start a flashing yellow light. This is supposed to stop the cars and allow the walker or biker to get across the street safely. As I said previously, in this town yellow means "Hurry up." It doesn't mean "STOP." I have seen so many people nearly get run over at these pedestrian cross-walks. Why doesn't the city change them to RED?
And then there's the fact that we are prohibited from wishing from bridges. If you make a wish and throw a penny off the bridge into the creek , you die. No wonder we're all weird.